The Delusions Of Officer Jim Lahey
Jim tazers the camera crew.


June 1, 2003




Mike Clattenburg

Barrie Dunn

Michael Volpe


Mike Clattenburg

John Paul Tremblay

Robb Wells

Jackie Torrens


Ricky (Robb Wells)

Julian (John Paul Tremblay)

Bubbles (Mike Smith)

Jim Lahey (John Dunsworth)

Randy (Patrick Roach)

Lucy (Lucy Decoutere)

Sarah (Sarah Dunsworth)

J-Roc (Jonathan Torrens)

Ray (Barrie Dunn) (credit only)

Cory (Cory Bowles)

Trevor (Michael Jackson)

Trinity (Jeanna Harrison) (credit only)

Barb Lahey (Shelley Thompson) (credit only)

T (Tyrone Parsons)

Guest Stars

Officer Erica Miller Shauna MacDonald

Liquor Store Attendant (Kim Dunn) (uncredited)


On the anniversary of Jim's dismissal from the police force, he gets drunk and assigns himself and Randy the roles of Sunnyvale's official police force.

Plot Synopsis Edit


All the boys are playing street hockey and Ricky accidentally shoots the ball into Jim's still wrecked trailer, smashing the glass case which contains his old police uniform. Lahey decides he needs to get drunk.

Act One Edit

The boys demand their ball back from Jim. Randy politely asks the boys not to mess with Lahey today but they are rude to him in return. Randy pulls rank and shuts the game down. Back in the trailer, Randy finds Lahey wearing his old police uniform and a toupee. With the hockey ball in hand, he takes Randy to the liquor store. Bubbles is worried about Lahey's behaviour, and the game is postponed.

Ricky explains how they are making a down payment of $3000 toward their cruise using money from bottle returns. At the liquor store, Randy tries to buy booze, but the store is robbed by an masked criminal, who gets apprehended outside the building by Lahey, still wearing his uniform and acting like he's a real cop. He leaves the arrest to store security and departs with Randy.

Back at their trailer, Lahey hatches a plan. They break out Lahey's old motorcycle with sidecar and descend upon the Roc Pile. Lahey says that Sunnyvale has been declared a town by the Canadian government and that he and Randy are the official police force.

Act Two Edit

The gang is at Lucy and Sarah's salon getting the scoop on Lahey's 'good news' -- none of them buy it. Meanwhile, Lahey is building his own makeshift jail cell out of a shed. While the 'police force' begins racking up citations in the park, Randy expresses concern over pretending to be a cop.

They return to J-Roc's place and demand they shut off their loud music. When they refuse, Lahey smashes their boom box and tells them they have a warrant for Ricky and Julian's arrest. Then they detain Cory and Trevor while siphoning gas and ask about the boys' whereabouts in return for letting them off. They tell Lahey what they know.

Next, the 'cops' arrive at Lucy and Sarah's trailer and demand Ricky give himself up. When they don't, Lahey shoots at the trailer. Meanwhile, at Julian's place, he and Bubbles talk over their plan to steal bottles from Trinity's school and pay cruise deposit. When they hear a gunshot, Ricky barges in and they all take cover. While Bubbles distracts Lahey by (badly) pretending to be Julian, the other two sneak out the back. They are spotted and apprehended by Jim while trying to start the shitmobile. Jim tazes them both, as well as the camera crew, and impounds Bubbles' go-cart.

With Ricky and Julian now in the jail-shed, Randy approaches alone and admits that Lahey has gone too far. Lahey arrives and orders Randy to gag the prisoners.

Act Three Edit

Bubbles gathers supplies to break the boys out of the shed. Randy approaches him and says he will assist in the jail break as long the cops will not be called on Lahey. Randy then goes back to the trailer and distracts Jim while Bubbles attempts to free the boys. Lahey sees through Randy's subterfuge and eventually catches Bubbles in the act of freeing his friends.

Lahey holds them all at bay with a loaded shotgun, and Randy tells Jim he's already called the real police. When Lahey fires a warning shot in the air, Randy tazes him and he is subdued. Jim starts crying and police sirens are heard in the distance. Randy begs Julian to cover this up so Lahey won't go to jail. Since the officer on scene is Erica Miller charming her out of an arrest is an easy task for him. However, as a part of his cover story, he cons Lahey out of $3000 saying they were simply discussing his offer to donate $3000 to the Sunnyvale Street Hockey Team. Miller takes Jim's badge and leaves the park.

Later, Julian trades Lahey's badge (which he has managed to get back from Erica) for the hockey ball, and it's 'game on'.

References Edit

Rickyisms Edit

"It's like he's got these things going on up there in his brain compartments that aren't working properly. He's got these fuckin' picological shit goin' on..."

(while in the jail cell) "You can't fuckin' retain me!"

He also complains that Lahey electromacuted him with the stun gun.

Lahey's Shit Talk Edit

"When you keep getting pelted with shit-balls, deputy, you gotta get a shit-bat."

"Randy, the shit-pool is getting full. We better drain it before it overflows and causes a shit-slide that could cover this entire community. I will not have a Pompeiian catastrophe happening in Sunnyvale."

"You boys would risk imprisonment for those shit-idiots?" (then, a few seconds later) "We gotta nail those shitiots."


  • According to Randy, it has been a week since Trevor crashed the Shitmobile into Lahey's trailer ("Where In The Fuck Is Randy's Barbeque?") and indicates during an interiew that "today is the anniversary of the day Mr. Lahey got kicked off the force".
  • This is one of the few episodes where the episode title is not taken directly from a line spoken in the episode.

So it might appear that this episode and "Halloween 1977" conflict with one another, as there are no outward indications within this episode that it is even close to being Halloween. However, it could be reasoned that it had taken some time for the situation following Jim's 1977 arrest to reach the point where he was pressured into resigning (or was dismissed from the police force) somewhere in the spring, summer or fall of 1978.

  • This episode further explores Mr. Lahey's declining mental state and that he may be loosing his grip on reality as he had firmly believed that he was in fact, a real police officer for the Sunnyvale Trailer Park.
  • It was never explained how Mr. Lahey was able to hold on to his actual badge, as it is usual for cops to turn them in, along with their guns and ID, when they are dismissed from the force as a disciplinary action, as Jim has been.
  • This episode also goes to show how much Julian may actually care for Mr. Lahey, or at the very least, want to stay on his good side when he convinces Erica to return Jim's badge. Jim is clearly touched by this.
Previous Episode: Next Episode:
"Where In The Fuck Is Randy's Barbeque?" "A Shit Leopard Can't Change Its Spots"