The Shit Blizzard


Jun 19, 2005




Mike Clattenburg

Barrie Dunn

Michael Volpe


Mike Clattenburg

John Paul Tremblay

Robb Wells

Mike Smith

Jonathan Torrens

Iain MacLeod


Ricky (Robb Wells)

Julian (John Paul Tremblay)

Bubbles (Mike Smith)

Jim Lahey (John Dunsworth)

Randy (Patrick Roach)

Lucy (Lucy Decoutere)

Sarah (Sarah Dunsworth)

J-Roc (Jonathan Torrens)

Ray (Barrie Dunn) (credit only)

Cory (Cory Bowles)

Trevor (Michael Jackson)

Trinity (Jeanna Harrison)

Barb Lahey (Shelley Thompson) (credit only)

T (Tyrone Parsons)

Detroit Velvet Smooth (Garry James) (credit only)

Guest Stars

Cyrus (Bernard Robichaud)

Dennis (Nobu Adilman)

Terry (Mio Adilman)

Dennis & Terry's Grandmother (Fokuko Saito)

Officer George Green (George Green (actor))

Detective Ted Johnson (Jim Swansburg)'

Phil Collins (Richard Collins)

Police Officer (Novelee Buchan)


Cyrus comes in search of his stolen hash and Lahey reveals in his plan to rid himself of the boys forever.

Plot Synopsis[edit | edit source]

Teaser[edit | edit source]

In jail, J-Roc and T have heard Cyrus and his gang threaten to kill Ricky, Julian, and Bubbles when they get out. At the park Randy and Lahey are preparing the final phase of their plan.

Act One[edit | edit source]

The boys slice up the rest of the hash, and J-Roc and T arrive. They tell the boys that Cyrus and his gang were just bailed out by Randy. Ricky puts two and two together and realizes he used Julian's trailer money. They prepare for a gunfight, and J-Roc is sent to retrieve some weapons from a hiding spot. Bubbles worries excessively about flying bullets. Ricky goes to tell Trinity to go to her grandma's.

Lahey sees J-Roc and T with the guns and makes subtle taunts. They stash the weapons in the shitmobile and then bail—J-Roc doesn't play guns. Cory and Trevor are called and are given jobs as roof snipers. Bubbles breaks down and pleads to Julian for a way to avoid a gunfight. Julian changes the plan and tells Ricky and Bubbles to hide.

Cyrus arrives with Dennis and Terry and sees a giant picture of Cyrus riding a giant penis, signed by Ricky (but drawn by Lahey) -- he is outraged. They find Cyrus' stolen car and call the boys out. Julian waves a white flag and surrenders. All three come out and Julian tries to get out of it by stroking Cyrus' ego, but he's still pissed about the drawing. Julian says all of this is Lahey's doing. Cyrus begins to cart off the hash.

Julian radios Cory and Trevor to tell them not to fire, but the transmission is garbed and they think they are being told to shoot. So they shoot at Cyrus, and in return they are both shot. The boys fire back at Cyrus and the battle begins.

Act Two[edit | edit source]

The boys go for the big guns, and take positions. Cory and Trevor are incapacitated by minor wounds. Using the shitmobile, the boys enter the battlefield, guns blazing. Julian covers and removes Cory and Trevor from the scene. They all meet up at a different location, and Officer George Green shows up. He is responding to Lahey's call but Lahey is drunk and incoherent. George is about to cancel the call but hears gunfire in the distance. The shitmobile tries to get to a hospital but they are fired upon by Cyrus again, so another skirmish begins. Ricky starts to complain about chest pain, and then admits he is having a heart attack.

While Bubbles covers Ricky, Julian goes to get Lahey since he is the only one in the park who knows CPR. Ted Johnson arrives, and is informed by Bubbles what's going on. More enemy fire and Ted gets in the game, calling for backup. Julian tries to convince Jim to save Ricky's life, but he is uninterested. A final play on Jim's heartstrings finally convinces him.

While trying to take a last piss with bullets flying overhead, Ricky lays down at Bubbles' feet and dies. Lahey arrives six minutes later and starts CPR even though it might be detrimental to bring him back at that point. It works, and Ricky comes to, Bubbles calls Jim a hero.

Cyrus and his gang try to make a getaway, but the backup arrives, and they are all arrested. Ted tries to discern who is to blame for the incident and who a particular gun belongs to, and Ricky claims innocence. Ted persists and closes in on Bubbles, but Ricky clears him and takes the rap instead. He is taken away, but thanks Jim for saving his life before he goes.

Act Three[edit | edit source]

Later, Lahey is given a bravery award at a ceremony by Ted Johnson. He is drunk and stumbles all over the stage while making his acceptance speech.

Bubbles complains that Julian and Ricky are in jail, along with Cory and Trevor. In his cell Julian blames most of it on them. Ricky talks about how he survived being dead: he figures that since he is less smart than others, his brain uses less oxygen and that allowed him recover from death without major damage.

References[edit | edit source]

Rickyisms[edit | edit source]

(to Trinity) "You know how much I love you, right?... More than anything that ever has been going to happen and can ever really happen times ten."

"I'm having a hark attack, buddy."

"Thing with me is I am smart. I'm self-smarted... I've self-learned myself."

Lahey's Shit Talk[edit | edit source]

"Feel that, Randy?... The way the shit clings to the air, Randy? It's already started, my dear good friend... the shit-blizzard."

Donny Screams

  • Throughout the gun fight, Donny screams "WHAT IN THE FUCK!?" and "FUCK OFF WITH THE GUNS!"
  • After a brief cease fire, Donny then screams "WELL, DON'T FUCKING STOP ON MY ACCOUNT!"
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